explore deeply

Failure

What can failure teach us?

Be who you want, Inspiring, Life Lessons, Learning to Love YourselfChloë RainComment
I have learned to give, not because I have much, but because I know exactly how it feels to have nothing.

When things go wrong all at once, it's hard to see the bright side. But what if losing out can teach us to be more appreciative for what we truly have?

Even if it's not the easiest way to learn to savor the small moments, sometimes failure or loss can be the biggest reminders of what is really important in life.


Many successful people tell us that we should keep a Gratitude Journal, that this is a key activity of every successful and happy person. Many thought leaders have suggested that when we understand how to practice gratitude in our daily lives we will become more prosperous and happy people ourselves.

I had read this, maybe even tried keeping a gratitude journal once or twice, but I really didn't know what gratitude was all about or how to practice gratitude. Not because I was unthankful, I just didn't understand what it meant to feel grateful for the things in my life, when it seemed that most everyone I knew, including myself, was hell bent on accomplishing more, getting more things, and climbing the Mount Everest of Achievements, faster than everyone else. When I took stock of my life, it felt like time was running out. How could I possibly do, get, and achieve everything I thought I needed to in this lifetime?

I tried to grasp the concept of gratitude, for my current life circumstances, because I knew it would be a good thing if I did. And even in that thought process, I had missed the boat entirely.

Gratitude is an emotion expressing appreciation for what one has—as opposed to, for example, a consumer-driven emphasis on what one wants.

Studies show that we can deliberately cultivate gratitude, and can increase our well-being and happiness by doing so.

In addition, gratefulness—and especially expression of it to others—is associated with increased energy, optimism, and empathy.
— Psychology Today

Gratitude wasn't something I learned through appreciation or journaling, or taking stock in my life and my relationships.

No, gratitude, was something I learned through failure and defeat.

Strangely, the process of defeat became the teacher of one of the most important and immutable life lessons one can learn in this lifetime. Becoming grateful for my life and everything I had (and then didn't have) was the ROI I received when I invested everything I had in an ideal and lost it all.

What I learned was that my ability to dream, implement, follow through, lose it all, recover against all odds, and optimistically work toward an ideal with hope beyond hope, helped me to see the value of what it means to be alive. 

Learning gratitude for life, creativity, resourcefulness, and becoming grateful for life force still coursing within me, was the immeasurable bounty of going broke.

There are times when our world feels like it is breaking down and dissolving right in front of our eyes and we might feel like it is totally out of our control.

At the same time, something strange begins to happen inside ourselves... We begin to become more resourceful than we have ever been before. We begin to think creatively. We begin to know our own self-worth in a way that we've never contemplated or experienced before.

As we are stripped of things we once thought were important, we begin to understand that at the core of our being we are worthy of existence, not because of what we do or what we have, but because of who we are.

Your life and the value you bring to the world through your own self expression and creativity are the most priceless possessions that no one and NO thing can ever take from you. There is no other speck of stardust in the Universe just like you. No one else thinks your thoughts, feels your feelings, has your desires, or is capable of doing the things you do, in the way that you and only you do them.

The essence of Gratitude, is appreciation for life in and of itself. Your life matters, because you are You, and no one else can do what you are here to do. Since you are still alive, your life has a reason and a purpose and if there is breath in your lungs, you haven't fulfilled your mission on Earth. Time to figure out what you are still doing here, and go for it.


Now I am Truly Free : Finding Purpose in Life : Chloe Rain

There is a story of a great guru, who had only one material object: A bowl which he used to beg for food. He stopped at a well to drink and accidentally dropped the bowl into the well. His response?

"Now I am truly free".


Chloë Rain is the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement. She is a Spiritual Teacher & Intuitive Guide.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and joy in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and fulfillment in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

8 Ways to Ensure Failure

Be who you want, Receive More Thursdays, InspiringChloë RainComment
  1. Give up. Sometimes your breakthroughs will look and feel a lot like breakdowns. This is a great news! Have you ever exercised so hard you felt like you were going to throw up? Have you ever exercised for a long enough period of time to see and feel the results of your efforts in your body? If you feel like you're getting squeezed through the eye of a needle, or like your life has just gone through the human version of a trash compactor, good news! You've just been rid of all that was blocking you from your breakthrough!

  2. Garbage in, garbage out. You are what you eat, you are what you consume. What are you telling yourself? What kinds of thoughts do you allow to take up space in your daily routine? What are you nourishing your soul with these days? What kinds of things are you feeding your mind? What are you doing to nourish your body? How much time do you spend making yourself wrong?

  3. Don't take a bath.

  4. Don't sleep on it.

  5. Vow that you must figure it out for yourself by yourself. Don't show your face or tell anyone about what's ailing you until you've solved the problem or recovered from the heartbreak all by yourself.

  6. Refuse to make time to receive help, even when you've got a built in support system wanting to help you.

  7. Don't do anything you've ever done that has worked before, because you've "been there done that" and you must find an absolutely new way to solve every problem so that you can declare your genius, with proof. Sometimes doing the simple tried and true thing to make you feel better can instantly and dramatically shift the potential outcome of the situation. I know you don't want to, but just give it a try.

  8. Be critical of yourself. Beat yourself up like you would take a hammer to a puppy who just messed on the floor. Don't allow yourself any self compassion like you would tell your son who was shunned by his friends in kindergarten because he did something that wasn't normal to "suck it up, there must be something wrong with you!" "You should try harder to fit in and be like everyone else!" And how you would tell your daughter who just lost her allowance when she invested in a friends candy bar scheme that didn't pan out "You're so stupid. You're never going to have money again in your life!" "You must have attracted that loss into your life because you're not open to receiving!"

Sound at all familiar?   Here's what I recommend instead:

  1. Take giving up off your list of options. You can't unlearn the things you know or undo the desires you've claimed. You can only always go forward. Trust there is a breakthrough and a miracle waiting for you on the other side of the breakdown. Giving up isn't an option any longer, the only way forward is through.

  2. Pay attention to your focus and attention. What you focus on expands. Don't spend any time making yourself wrong for well anything. Not one second. Not one more second.

  3. Take a bath, preferably, or at least a shower. You always feel different, if not better after taking a bath and letting the water seep in. Do you know how many clients tell me they had a brilliant breakthrough in the bathtub!??! Or came up with a brilliant solution while scrubbing in the shower?! If you're stuck, go get your behind in the shower, right now. Seriously.

  4. Take naps. If you're stressed out, go to bed. If you're sad, sleep the day away. If you can't figure out the answer or the solution, sleep on it. Science has proven that "sleeping on it" actually helps our brains solve problems more quickly and our bodies heal faster.

  5. Do not isolate. Ask for help, care, love, support, or just some company from someone you know has always got your back, no matter what. Make sure its someone you can trust with your tender heart, someone who thinks you're great despite all the flaws.

  6. Do not stuff your emotions. Take time to tap your resources, telling yourself you do not have time to figure out a solution or you do not have time to make yourself feel better, will not make the problem go away. You will not feel better by shelving your emotions until a more convenient time.

  7. Try something that has worked for you in the past. Can you think of a time when you had a breakthrough? What were you doing just before it happened? What helped you to usher in that insight? Maybe you just need to listen to a good song that always lifts your mood. You'll be surprised what even a tiny shift in emotion can do for your clarity.

  8. Learn self compassion. Build your self compassion muscle like you were training for the Iron Man and pulling 4 ton dump trucks for show. Flex your self compassion muscle all day long, like you are training to climb Mount Everest. Then when thing edgy painful things come up you will have a well of self compassion to cleansing and nurture your wounds.

Right on the other side of the breakdown is the breakthrough. In the meantime, take a nap, eat your candy bar stash, while floating in the bath tub, listening to your favorite guilty pleasure song.  

Don't take yourself too seriously and don't cheat yourself out of too much life experience because you're afraid you're gonna do it wrong, or get hurt in the end.

Chloe Rain Explore Deeply
 

With love,

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Feeling the heartbreak and misery of failure is something I do not take lightly. Feeling like a failure and being miserable, is something I will absolutely not stand for! Take a stand for yourself. Take a stand for life and your wellness.

Do you feel a deep longing to be on purpose and in service to the world?

Walking the Path of Purpose Apprenticeship may be for you...

Chloë Rain is the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement. She is a Spiritual Teacher & Intuitive Guide.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and joy in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and fulfillment in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!