explore deeply

the art of living your life purpose

Learning to Love Yourself

As I remember love, that leaves yet never leaves

Learning to Love Yourself, Nature, PoetryChloë RainComment
radek-grzybowski-67609.jpg

The Winter Wood Arrives

I think
I could have
built a little house
to live in

with the single cord—
half seasoned, half not—
trucked into the
driveway and

tumbled down. But, instead,
friends came
and together we stacked it
for the long, cold days

that are—
maybe the only sure thing in the world—
coming soon.
How to keep warm

is always a problem,
isn’t it?
Of course, there’s love.
And there’s prayer.

I don’t belittle them,
and they have warmed me,
but differently,
from the heart outwards.

Imagine
what swirls of frost will cling
to the windows, what white lawns
I will look out on

as I rise from morning prayers,
as I remember love, that leaves yet never leaves,
as I go out into the yard
and bring the wood in

with struggling steps,
with struggling thoughts,
bundle by bundle,
to be burned.

— Mary Oliver

 
Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

Moving Beyond Emotional Pain

Learning to Love Yourself, Life LessonsChloë Rain
Getting Rid of Emotional Pain

Sober and emotionless, I hiked to the top of the mountain and sat on the edge of the cliff with the intention of jumping off of it. The ache of emptiness, was too much to bear, and tearless I arrived at the place of contemplation.

"I am dead."

"I am dead on the inside."

Sitting at the precipice, all I could determine was that I didn't want to be dead, not truly dead.

Methodically, I began to take stock of my life, if I didn't want to be walking around dead on the inside, then I must want to be truly living. And if the life I was living made me feel like I wanted to end it all, then I had to make some changes that could make me feel like my life was worth living.

I became resolute to change the feeling of my life. I must start feeling alive, truly alive.

And more so I want to feel like my life has meaning.

Maybe I would go to Paris and fall in love and things would be different.


And so I went... to Paris, to fall in love... then to Peru, to find myself... then to Ireland, to find my why.... then home, to find my roots...

I discovered where I'd lost myself in the first place...

I will tell you, these things that seem random at the time, change us forever.  

The places we go, the places we live, the connections we make, the bonds that are created, they may seem completely random at the time. Yet in an instant or a phone call or a night spent in a bar drinking whisky in the arctic circle, your whole life is changes forever.

I didn't find a husband, but I did fall in love, a couple of times.

I fell in love with storytelling and writing, I fell in love with photography, I fell in love with my family, I fell in love with my friends and connections, all over the globe, I fell in love with myself.

As it turns out, I was inextricably changed forever by my experiences and there was no going back to sizing myself into that confining box that made me feel empty to the core.

Not every instance, not every phone call, and certainly not every night I've ever spent in a bar has changed me in this way..... then again maybe they have, maybe they do.

It's true that when you turn inward and fall in love with the truth of who you really are, you become whole, despite the brokenness. 

By this time next year, I will have changed again. Things will be different. I will be telling the stories of what I'm going through right now, they will be beautiful stories of some of the most amazing moments of my life.

The moments of darkness will also have been weathered with time into a beautiful patina of memories, backlit by firelight, digested on a full belly, with a nourished soul. By next year, they too will become beautiful stories.

May you have the courage to follow your heart,

 
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Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

No Make Up

Poetry, Be who you want, Learning to Love YourselfGuest WriterComment
Poetry about being a woman

Maybe one reason I do not wear makeup is to scare people.
If they’re close enough, they can see something is different with me,
something unnerving, as if I have no features,
I am embryonic, pre-eyebrows, pre-eyelids, pre-mouth,
I am like a water-bear talking to them,
or an amniotic traveller,
a vitreous floater on their own eyeball,
human ectoplasm risen on its hind legs to discourse with them.
And such a white white girl, such a sickly toadstool,
so pale, a visage of fog, a phiz of
mist above a graveyard, no magenta roses,
no floral tribute, no goddess, no grownup
woman, no acknowledgment
of the drama of secondary sexual characteristics, just the
gray matter of spirit talking,
the thin features of a gray girl in a gray graveyard—
granite, ash, chalk, dust.
I tried the paint, but I could feel it on my skin, I could
hardly move under the mask of my
desire to be seen as attractive in the female
way of 1957,
and I could not speak. And when the makeup came off I felt
actual as a small mammal in the woods
with a speaking countenance, or a basic
primate, having all the expressions
that evolved in us, to communicate.
If my teen-age acne had left scars,
if my skin were rough, instead of soft,
I probably couldn’t afford to hate makeup,
or to fear so much the beauty salon or the
very idea of beautyship.
And my mother was beautiful—did I say this?
In my small eyes, and my smooth withered skin,
you can see my heart, you can read my naked lips.

— Sharon Olds

She is the author of the poetry collection “Stag’s Leap,” which was recently produced as a staged reading by the Salt Lake City Acting Company.

 

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2018/09/10/no-makeup

Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

Walking Your Path — One Step at a Time

Learning to Love Yourself, Life LessonsChloë RainComment
Walking Your Path In Life
When there is nothing left to burn you have to set yourself on fire....
— Stars

Some years ago, I went in to ten days of silence. We sat in 12 hours of meditation a day for 10 full days. We ate only 2 meals a day, breakfast was at 6am, lunch was at noon, and there was no dinner and we went to bed at 9pm. I was in complete silence for 10 full days, and on the eleventh day silence was broken.  

Just before I had entered complete silence.... I resigned from my career. 15 years of hard work and trying to fit myself into a successful mold, and I had found myself on the brink of a mental, emotional, and physical break down.

On the outside my life wasn't that bad, but on the inside I felt completely dead.

I was compelled to go to the top of a mountain and determine whether or not I wanted to end my life or my life to go on. I didn't arrive at this place sobbing and clutching my heart, I arrived at this place soberly, with a dull ache and emptiness in my heart. I could see no way out.

On top of that mountain, I reached the conclusion that I didn't want to be dead. That was the only thing I was sure of, I didn’t want to be dead, and so I determined that must mean I wanted to be alive! I could only think of one thing to do about it. Start living my life. And if the life I was living made me want to end it all, then I had to make some changes in my life. And so I began by taking that huge nextstep, off of the path that had lead me to feeling like I wanted to die, and on to a path I'd never walked before, one that was only revealed to me one step at a time.

I have joked ever since, that the best thing you could do for yourself after you make one of the wildest decisions of your life, is to go sit in silence with yourself and listen to your thoughts for ten days.

On the other side of that silence, I was more clear than I'd ever been that somehow I'd made the right decision, even though I had no idea what my next step was.

In going within I was able to discover the insight of the answer that I already knew within my heart and soul.

But no one can make you act on that awareness.

Only you can know the truth for you and only you can act on that truth.

And there is no secret cure all pill, there is no magic 8 ball with all the answers. Happiness is a constant choice and state of being regardless of your external circumstances. This may be difficult to grasp at first, but once you understand that you are your own source of wisdom, life challenges take on new meaning.

Learning our own wisdom is the greatest gift and most effective tool to heal, experience fulfillment, and create and recreate our lives. As we have new awarenesses, new experiences come to us. As we have new awarenesses we realize new opportunities to make different choices and so then life shows up differently.

Everyone arrives at this threshold in their own timing, and the only person who can walk through that door and into a new way of being is you. You hold the keys and you hold the answers to all the questions you are asking. This is the secret to enlightenment.

In following that voice that was guiding me toward more life and being alive, I found a love for storytelling and writing, I found a love for art, and for photography, I found a new love for my family, I found a new love for my friendships and connections, and most importantly, I found a love for myself.

The things that seem random at the time, change us forever. The places we go, the places we live, the connections we make, the bonds that are created, may seem completely random, and yet in an instant or a phone call or a night spent in a bar drinking whisky in the arctic circle, your whole existence is changed forever.

I know that by this time next year, I will have changed. Things will be different because I keep listening and keep acting on new awareness. By next year, I will be telling the stories of what I'm going through right now, and they will be beautiful stories of some of the toughest moments of my life and I know that the moments of darkness experienced right now, can be transformed into beautiful pieces of gold. 

Soon, they will all be beautiful stories.

As you turn inward and fall in love with the truth of who you really are, you become whole, despite the brokenness.

One step at a time.


Reclaim Your Unique Vision

A vision is not a glimpse of what will be in the future — it’s an awareness of what is already true within you, here and now.

The vision is not something you make up, it is who you were born to be. It’s your true power, your essence, your genius, and the source of your abundance.

When you are cut off from the truth of your essence, you don’t just fail to fulfill your potential, you experience many other side-effects. The challenges you face in the other areas — health, work, relationships, prosperity — are often symptoms of a disconnection from this divine pattern in you. That’s why many attempts to solve those other problems don’t work — because they’re symptoms, not the cause.

When you rediscover your vision and begin to align with the forces of nature, you activate the latent power within you and begin to dissolve many of your problems.

Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

Reconnecting with Your Inherent Divinity and Worthiness

Healing, Learning to Love YourselfGuest WriterComment
How to Reconnect with Your Inherent Divinity & Worthiness

The most powerful learning I ever received in my life was the answer to the following question:

What makes a person worthy to be loved?

When this question was put to a group of highly intelligent individuals, their answers fell into two categories:

  1. "To Do-ers" feel that worthiness is a result of what a person is willing TO DO to get love (as in "I am a good husband because I bring home a good paycheck, mow the lawn, etc").

  2.  "To Be-ers" feel that worthiness is a result of what a person is willing TO BE to get love (as in "I am a good wife because I am obedient, helpful, and what everyone else expects me to be").

It might astound you to know that BOTH these answers are WRONG.

What makes a person worthy to be loved is NOT what they are willing to DO or to BE. What makes a person worthy to be loved is simply because they EXIST, a person is worthy to be loved because they are, no matter what it is that they are doing or being.

Most societies in the world today fall into the "To Do" (the West) or "To Be" (the East) philosophy. Since everyone has a common need to be loved, the world is full of "To Do-ers" and "To Be-ers". The problem is that at the core of your being is your inner child who needs to be loved because it "IS".

Your inner child is an "I am-er" meaning it is worthy to be loved simply because it exists.

Love is the only medicine that can cure deep wounds.

Until your inner child is at peace, it will throw the most mature adult into chaos if it is not recognized, nurtured, and loved. By loving the child inside, you help the adult outside to reconnect with your inherent divinity ("I am-ness") as God intended.


How to Reconnect with your Inherent Divinity and Worthiness Exercise

Careful preparation is the key to making this exercise successful for you.

Before you attempt to do this exercise, you must decide whether you are a "ToDo-er" or a "ToBe-er" or whether you are both.

If you have aspects of both inside you, then you must do this exercise twice. First handle the "ToDo-er" aspect of yourself one week, REST, and then handle to the "ToBe-er" aspect at least one week later (3 weeks rest is preferable).

Preparation:

Do this exercise at night after you have taken a bath but before you have gone to bed. It is best you do it when you will be able to sleep the next day (do it Friday night if you can rest on the weekend). Being comfortable is the key. You need to wear comfortable, loose fitting clothing. You will also need to do this in a room that has a mirror. Bathrooms work well for this because:

  • there is usually a large mirror,

  • there is always a door so you can be alone, and

  • it is very symbolic of the internal cleansing and healing that you are intending to do.

Do this exercise in a peaceful place where you will be completely quiet and undisturbed for the entire session. This session should last for as long as your inner child needs. Since children (even inner ones) have short attention spans, this exercise usually takes less than 30 minutes.

ALWAYS ACT with absolute conviction that what you are imagining is REAL. To your inner child, there is NO difference between what is real and what is imagined. This is why a healing IMAGINED can have a REAL result (like the cancer patients who healed themselves by imagining away their disease).

Be patient with yourself in the time to come. Healing your inner child can be quite disorienting until the changes are fully integrated. It is VERY powerful and it takes time for the work that you have done on the inner bodies to be reflected in your outer body ("as above, so below").

  1. Look at yourself in the mirror and think back to when you were a child (in this lifetime). Give your Inner Child permission to bring the pain you endured when you were either trying "TO DO" or "TO BE" something as a child to get the love that you so desperately wanted.

  2. Acknowledge your Inner Child's pain by saying the phrases below with as much passion and emotion as you can while staring deeply into your own eyes:

"I know you are not happy. I respect your feelings."

"I love you. I want to heal you so that you can feel better."

"Please allow me to heal the hurt you hold inside you."

If you are a "ToDo-er" continue below, if a "ToBe-er" scroll to the bottom.

"ToDo-er" Exercise includes the following additional steps:

Acknowledge to yourself that if you have "TO DO" something to get love, then

  • What you believe is that ACTION is required to produce a RESULT of love and

  • What you fear is ACTIONS are not enough and you fear BECOMING your true self.

Fill your memory with incidents where you were made to feel that you were NOT DOING enough. Listen to the voices of others who said you were not doing enough and pay attention to how you feel at your core: where your inner child is.

If you cannot hear the voices clearly, imagine the phrases below being spoken by those who have told you that you were NOT DOING enough.

"No one REALLY likes you for who you are."
"You are a big disappointment: you should have done..."
"People can only like you or notice you for what you do."
"People only like you for what you have / can give them."

The only medicine to cure a bad case of "ToDo-ism" is good healthy dose of self acceptance. Most often a "ToDo-er" cannot accept themselves as they are due to a painful rejection by a loved one(s). To heal this pain, the "ToDo-er" will first need to TAKE ACTION to heal the core issue(s). If there is no core incident, then a shorter version of this process needs to be applied:

While looking in the mirror, visualize yourself as both your guardian angel (responsible for raising your self acceptance) and your inner child (who has difficulty with self acceptance).

Imagine an incident where you as "guardian angel" come to the rescue of you as "inner child". Do everything you can to inflate your inner child's self esteem. As guardian, take the actions or speak the words needed to resolve feelings about the person trying to harm your inner child.

Imagine a happy ending to this situation. Be careful not to make people the inner child fears act unrealistically. Act, as the guardian angel, the way an adult can act in the situation to protect the inner child (but in ways the helpless child cannot act to protect themselves).

Example of "ToDo-er" Exercise: At the end of this exercise, your inner child should feel empowered enough to reclaim the "chunks of him/herself" that others have taken from him/her by convincing him/her that she/he must always do more.

This is because you as guardian angel have told him/her things like:

"You are a wonderful person: I support all that you do."
"It's not what you do that matters, it's who you are."
"Encourage your own natural abilities: be yourself."
"God does not reject you but accepts you as you are."

"ToBe-er" Exercise includes the following additional steps:

Acknowledge to yourself that if you have "TO BE" something to get love, then:

  • What you believe is that CHARACTER is required to produce a RESULT of love and

  • What you fear is your CHARACTER is not enough and you fear DOING for yourself.

Fill your memory with incidents where you were made to feel that you were NOT BEING enough. Listen to the voices of others who said you were not good enough and pay attention to how you feel at your core: where your inner child is.

If you cannot hear the voices clearly, imagine the phrases below being spoken by those who have told you that you were NOT BEING enough

"You are not good enough to be with, to have, to get..."
"If you were good enough, this would/not have happened."
"You better never let that happen again: you must..."
"You better accept less so that you cannot fail again."

The only medicine to cure a bad case of "ToBe-ism" is good healthy dose of self esteem. Most often a "ToBe-er" cannot value themselves as they are due to the barrage of criticism they have received over the years from those around them. To heal this pain, the "ToBe-er" will first need to BECOME MORE OF WHO THEY REALLY ARE to heal such deeply inflicted wounds:

While looking in the mirror, visualize yourself as both your guardian angel (responsible for raising your self esteem) and your inner child (who is having difficulty with self esteem).

Imagine that you as "guardian angel" is taking off an old dirty, torn coat that your "inner child" is wearing. As guardian angel, ask the child who gave it this horrible thing. Assure the child that it will not be punished for telling the truth. Ask the child to list everyone who ever contributed to making it dirty and torn. Get your inner child to tell you absolutely everything that is burdening their troubled heart.

Imagine that you as guardian angel set the old, dirty, torn coat of shame and misery on fire. Ask your inner child to throw sticks on the coat so the flame burns hotter and higher. Tell the child that they are special, loved, and wonderful. Tell the child they deserve the best and they will become their own dreams. Since such wounds are deep, there may be many layers of dirty coats (which are negative beliefs about yourself) to be removed. Make sure you burn them all.

Example of "ToBe-er" Exercise: At the end of this exercise, your inner child should feel empowered enough to believe that his/her dreams can come true by convincing him/her that she/he is perfect just the way he/she is.

This is because you as guardian angel have told him/her things like:

"You are perfect, loved, and valued just as you are."
"You have, are, will be enough to live your dreams."
"God accepts you and values you as you are."
"God wishes to support you in every way."

When all the layers of "ToDo-ism" and "ToBe-ism" have been removed, you will be ready to embrace the "I am-ness" of yourself as a spiritual being in human form.


Reposted with Permission:  Inner Child Work- Resolving the "To Do"/"To Be" Dilemma | Adapted from an exercise developed by Ellen Mogensen and Sandra Skelly


Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

No, It's Not Selfish to Want to Go on a Spiritual Journey

Be who you want, Inspiring, Life Lessons, Learning to Love Yourself, Retreats, Rites of Passage, TravelGuest WriterComment
Why go on a spiritual journey

Is it greedy—or irresponsible—to go on a quest to discover who you are? Not even a little bit.

By Elizabeth Gilbert


The other day, a desperate-looking woman approached me on the street and grabbed my arm. I assumed she was about to ask for money—but she looked me in the eye and demanded, "Is it selfish that I want to go on a spiritual journey?" 

Now, this might seem like a bizarre question to be asked by a stranger, but I'm used to it. In the decade since I wrote Eat, Pray, Lovewhich is all about my own spiritual journey, I've been asked a variation of this question by thousands of women. (And I've certainly been accused of selfishness for having taken that journey.) 

Women constantly tell me they long to do what I did. Even if it's not possible for them to travel the world for a year, they want to create their own quest. They tell me they want to deepen their relationship with God and with themselves—but they don't want to seem entitled, irresponsible, frivolous. Aren't the demands of reality more important than their esoteric questions? And what if their spiritual journey leads them far from their cultural or religious origins, or disrupts their marriage? And what makes them think they're so special, anyhow, to deserve a spiritual quest? 

A lot of these anxieties stem from one problem: Often women believe they're not supposed to desire anything beyond home and family. But the craving they feel isn't wrong; it's human. Every spiritual journey in history has begun with a sense of dissatisfaction—with somebody saying, "This is not enough for me." 

Does it make you selfish, then, to go searching for something more? I say no—and here's why: 

You have the right to try to figure out who you are. 

This is not a simple task; you are a unique event in the history of the universe. There has never been a you—not your particular soul, living at this particular moment, faced with your particular challenges. Your existence is a mystery, a miracle, and an experiment of creation, and you are allowed to examine that mystery to the fullest. 

A spiritual journey bears no resemblance to a spa vacation. 

True spiritual investigation is rarely relaxing; expect your search to expose painful and challenging truths. We don't generally take on the fundamental questions because they're fun. Usually, we're brought to them on our knees. Staying with those questions, despite the discomfort, is a path for the brave.

Doing something for yourself isn't by definition selfish. 

In Mandarin, there are two words that translate to selfish in English. One means "doing something that benefits yourself." The other means "doing something greedy." In English, we don't have this distinction. In our puritanical culture, we tend to believe that anything benefiting us is probably greedy. But guess what? You can do great things for yourself without taking a thing away from anyone else. 

Going on a spiritual journey can be a public service. 

Spiritual journeys are attempts to alleviate self-suffering. And until you can alleviate your own suffering, you will continue to inflict suffering—not only on yourself, but also on those around you. Happy people are much better at caring for others than those who are in pain. (Haven't you witnessed the way misery and depression make you unable to think of anyone but yourself?) Once you've found peace, you will be able to serve humanity. 

All this is what I told that desperate-looking woman, and it's what I'm telling you now. If you long for a journey, embark on one—for yourself, for the people around you, for all of us. We learn from one another's paths. In fact, I guarantee you this: You will not be the only person you liberate along your private road to freedom.

Reposted from O Magazine

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Spiritual Journey to the Andes

Aya Vision Ceremony, Spiritual Immersions, and pilgrimages to the Mountains of Peru offered throughout the year...


Thank you, Liz Gilbert for this spot on piece on why taking a Spiritual Journey is not only in service to your Soul, but to the rest of the World! AHO. Ari.

This morning we sat down at Jack's Cafe, one of our favorite places to eat in our favorite neighborhood of San Blas (Cusco Peru). A dog followed us in from the street and put his head in my lap under our breakfast table, then laid down with his rump resting on my foot for the entirety of the meal and conversation.

In the window, next to the humongous bouquet of gladiolus that touch the ceiling with their blossoms, was an old copy of O Magazine, something about Oprah's outfit, wearing knee high muck boots and a ground grazing pink sequin skirt in her garden, caught my attention. The theme was "How to Show Up for Life"... so I was compelled to take a look at what Oprah had to say about this topic.

This spurred the most enthusiastic conversation about life, finding your own magic, creating right livelihood, Liz Gilbert, and a few other famous people and their messages— not to be mentioned here (because we don't agree with their message no matter how famous they are).

By the end of breakfast we were feeling most inspired about the day ahead, the work we had on our plates, and the very meaningful purpose for being alive.

Below are some pictures from the recent 2018 Spiritual Journeys in March and April, join me for the upcoming Spiritual Journey in October of this year! Check out more pictures of the sacred journey on → Facebook.


Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

What can failure teach us?

Be who you want, Inspiring, Life Lessons, Learning to Love YourselfChloë RainComment
I have learned to give, not because I have much, but because I know exactly how it feels to have nothing.

When things go wrong all at once, it's hard to see the bright side. But what if losing out can teach us to be more appreciative for what we truly have?

Even if it's not the easiest way to learn to savor the small moments, sometimes failure or loss can be the biggest reminders of what is really important in life.


Many successful people tell us that we should keep a Gratitude Journal, that this is a key activity of every successful and happy person. Many thought leaders have suggested that when we understand how to practice gratitude in our daily lives we will become more prosperous and happy people ourselves.

I had read this, maybe even tried keeping a gratitude journal once or twice, but I really didn't know what gratitude was all about or how to practice gratitude. Not because I was unthankful, I just didn't understand what it meant to feel grateful for the things in my life, when it seemed that most everyone I knew, including myself, was hell bent on accomplishing more, getting more things, and climbing the Mount Everest of Achievements, faster than everyone else. When I took stock of my life, it felt like time was running out. How could I possibly do, get, and achieve everything I thought I needed to in this lifetime?

I tried to grasp the concept of gratitude, for my current life circumstances, because I knew it would be a good thing if I did. And even in that thought process, I had missed the boat entirely.

Gratitude is an emotion expressing appreciation for what one has—as opposed to, for example, a consumer-driven emphasis on what one wants.

Studies show that we can deliberately cultivate gratitude, and can increase our well-being and happiness by doing so.

In addition, gratefulness—and especially expression of it to others—is associated with increased energy, optimism, and empathy.
— Psychology Today

Gratitude wasn't something I learned through appreciation or journaling, or taking stock in my life and my relationships.

No, gratitude, was something I learned through failure and defeat.

Strangely, the process of defeat became the teacher of one of the most important and immutable life lessons one can learn in this lifetime. Becoming grateful for my life and everything I had (and then didn't have) was the ROI I received when I invested everything I had in an ideal and lost it all.

What I learned was that my ability to dream, implement, follow through, lose it all, recover against all odds, and optimistically work toward an ideal with hope beyond hope, helped me to see the value of what it means to be alive. 

Learning gratitude for life, creativity, resourcefulness, and becoming grateful for life force still coursing within me, was the immeasurable bounty of going broke.

There are times when our world feels like it is breaking down and dissolving right in front of our eyes and we might feel like it is totally out of our control.

At the same time, something strange begins to happen inside ourselves... We begin to become more resourceful than we have ever been before. We begin to think creatively. We begin to know our own self-worth in a way that we've never contemplated or experienced before.

As we are stripped of things we once thought were important, we begin to understand that at the core of our being we are worthy of existence, not because of what we do or what we have, but because of who we are.

Your life and the value you bring to the world through your own self expression and creativity are the most priceless possessions that no one and NO thing can ever take from you. There is no other speck of stardust in the Universe just like you. No one else thinks your thoughts, feels your feelings, has your desires, or is capable of doing the things you do, in the way that you and only you do them.

The essence of Gratitude, is appreciation for life in and of itself. Your life matters, because you are You, and no one else can do what you are here to do. Since you are still alive, your life has a reason and a purpose and if there is breath in your lungs, you haven't fulfilled your mission on Earth. Time to figure out what you are still doing here, and go for it.


Now I am Truly Free : Finding Purpose in Life : Chloe Rain

There is a story of a great guru, who had only one material object: A bowl which he used to beg for food. He stopped at a well to drink and accidentally dropped the bowl into the well. His response?

"Now I am truly free".


Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

Sometimes Life is Difficult

Inspiring, Life Lessons, Learning to Love YourselfGuest Writer1 Comment
Sometimes Life is Difficult

Resistance tends to strengthen the energies it attempts to oppose by giving them power and energy to work against.

We all know the feeling of being repeatedly haunted by the same issue, no matter how we try to ignore it, avoid it, or run away from it. Sometimes it seems that we can get rid of something we don't want by simply pushing it away. Most of the time, the more we push away, the more we get pushed back. There are laws of physics and metaphysics that explain this phenomenon, which is often summed up in this pithy phrase: That which you resist persists. 

Resistance tends to strengthen the energies it attempts to oppose by giving them power and energy to work against. Additionally, resistance keeps us from learning more about what we resist. In order to fully understand something, we must open to it enough to receive its energy; otherwise, we remain ignorant of its lessons.

There is a Tibetan story of a monk who retreats to meditate in a cave only to be plagued by demons. He tries everything chasing, fighting, hiding to get the demons out of his cave, but the thing that finally works is surrender. He simply lets them have their way with him and only then do they disappear. 

Now, this wisdom must be applied practically. We are not meant to get ourselves physically injured. Instead, this story speaks of how, in essence, our demons are inside of us. What plagues and pursues us on an inner level has a way of manifesting itself in our environment in the form of people, events, and issues that appear to be beyond our control. But all these external expressions are reflections of our insides, and it is inside ourselves that we can safely experiment with surrendering to what we fear and dislike.

It may feel scary, and we may find ourselves in the company of a lot of resistance as we begin the process of opening to what we fear. But the more we learn to surrender, and the more the demons that plague us disappear in the process, the more courageous we will become.

Life is difficult. This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths. It is a great truth because once we truly see this truth, we transcend it. Once we truly know that life is difficult-once we truly understand and accept it-then life is no longer difficult. Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters.
— M. Scott Peck

Article BY MADISYN TAYLOR

Reposted with permission from DailyOM – Inspirational thoughts for a happy, healthy and fulfilling day.

Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

Sit. Feast on your Life.

Life Lessons, Poetry, Learning to Love YourselfChloë RainComment
Compassion - Darkness

LOVE AFTER LOVE

The time will come
when, with elation
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror
and each will smile at the other's welcome, 

and say, sit here. Eat. 
You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart
to itself, to the stranger who has loved you

all your life, whom you ignored
for another, who knows you by heart. 
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf, 

the photographs, the desperate notes, 
peel your own image from the mirror. 
Sit. Feast on your life. 

— Derek Walcott

Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

The Law of the Twinkie: Spiritual Enlightenment & Personal Freedom

Health Mind Happy Soul, Learning to Love Yourself, Life LessonsChloë RainComment

You eat Twinkies and you know they're not good for you, deep down inside you know.....

But you like eating twinkies and so you stay for a while in a state of confusion. You eat twinkies all the time. You think you love twinkies, twinkies make you feel satiated.

But deep down inside you know, something's not right.

One day you're feeling particularly bad about your eating of the Twinkies and so you start to get curious.

You educate yourself on nutrition and you are aware that the combination of flour and sugar has no nutritional value and is high in calories, but you still eat the twinkies.

Then doing more research you become aware that in fact there are worse ingredients in the Twinkies and that you like to numb yourself by eating the twinkies and you feel addicted to the twinkies. But you still eat the Twinkies.

Then you become aware that you numb yourself with food and you feel out of control of your craving because there is an emotional response trigger to not feeling comfortable in your body, so you eat to numb yourself and feel shame around your eating.

But you still eat the twinkies. Then you become aware that you started eating to numb yourself because you were violated as a child and it wasn't safe or comfortable to be in your body, so over eating protects you from being seen, protects you from being violated, numbs you from feeling the emotions in your body.  

Now every time you go to eat the twinkie you have a new insight about the choice you are making and you start to realize that it's really not about the twinkie, it's about how you feel inside your body and what emotions are attached to eating.

From this awareness, you can realize that the twinkie does not have power over you, the twinkie is not smarter than you, and you know that really what is occurring is an emotional trigger that you don't feel safe, you don't want to be seen, and you want to numb out in your body.  

From this place of awareness, you may still eat the twinkie.... the more you do the work the more clearing of the emotional trigger, the less and less the twinkie has power over your choices.

Then one day, it hits you. You no longer want the twinkie. You want to like yourself and feel good in your body. You start making different choices. You start to see the benefits of eating things that make you feel good about your choices instead of the twinkies, one day you even realize you enjoy eating things that make you feel good more than you have ever enjoyed eating twinkies.

Twinkies don’t totally disappear from your life, and every time you come up against the Twinkie you have to make the choice.
— The Law of the Twinkie

You start to feel better in your body. One choice at at time, you start to feel better. If one day you eat the twinkie, ok, no big deal, next time you have the opportunity to make an entirely new and fresh choice.

The key is that the twinkie no longer rules your life and your every decision. You are in control of your choices.

You start to trust yourself. 

Then One Day you realize many days have passed since you even thought of Twinkies, and you laugh at how silly and insignificant the Twinkie really is, and how powerful you have become.

In love and service,-logo-black (2).png
 
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Awareness is the key to making a different choice. Having awareness is 90% of what is needed to make changes. It is what you do with the awareness is what makes the difference.
Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

Polyamory, Monogamy, and My Spiritual Truth

Be who you want, Learning to Love Yourself, Life LessonsChloë RainComment
Polyamory, Monogamy, and Spiritual Truth

A facebook post on polyamory vs monogamy got me thinking about my seemingly unquenchable thirst for deep intimacy and committed partnership. The thread began... "If you can't do monogamy well, then you're probably not equipped to do polyamory well."

For a few days this thread would not leave my stream of consciousness, I revisited people's sharing a number of times, wondering for myself "What is it about monogamy being called out as unnatural that triggers me so much? And why can't I seem to do any relationship well?"

I am single, heterosexual, and identify as monogamous, though for the past decade only two of my relationships made it past the 3 month mark, and neither of those were intact by the 6 month mark.

A familiar inner dialogue ensued... I wondered— "What's wrong with me? Am I just not enlightened enough to understand the benefits of polyamory and are my traditional values nothing more than childhood imprinting?"

"Am I spiritually stunted in this arena?" 

I can't fathom being happy in a polyamours relationship and I haven't managed a long term satisfying monogamous relationship, either.

So what's up with that?

In truth, I've spent the last decade dedicated to my Spiritual Path, self awakening, and being in service to others. I recently ended 18 months of conscious celibacy, where my energy and focus was fully and completely on my relationship to the Divine.

But always on this path, I have known deep down inside that there is a longing to be in Spiritual and intimate romantic partnership with another.

You could say I am motivated in my work in the world by my desire to know and understand love, fully and completely as a spiritual being having a human experience. 

I have loved many, though I believe I have only been in love once— perhaps this makes me polyamorous? I don't know, there are so many criteria and definitions and boundaries, or lack thereof, in our modern "conscious" world that I find myself being utterly confused and sometimes... triggered. 

I identify as straight and monogamous, and I am a lover of all people. I am an advocate for all genders, and all human beings to be fully expressed in their true essence no matter what sexual orientation, gender, pangender, or where they fall on the spectrum of human desire and experience.

Pangender (and Omnigender) is a non-binary gender experience which refers to a wide multiplicity of genders that can stretch to the infinite. Meaning that this experience can go beyond the current knowledge of genders.

I believe that's what this debate is all about. The spectrum of human desire and knowing one's own Spiritual Truth.

I know that since this relationship trigger has been popping up a lot lately, I have an opportunity to learn something about myself and my emotions and grow beyond what is blocking me from aligning with my desire.

I believe that our internal desires and longings are the signposts that help to guide us to fulfill our unique destiny and life purpose in this lifetime. 

However, this does not mean we will have all of our heart's desires met upon demand. And this does not mean that we should not strive and go beyond our comfort zones because the thing we desire is unattainable.

We should strive and hope and aim for peace, clean water, healthy work life balance, sustainable economies, and accessible health care for all.

And a spiritually fulfilling, emotionally intimate, and wholly *holy* committed relationship. In whatever form that serves your highest good.

Oddly, being told that monogamy is unnatural, and that we should give up on this romantic ideal, helped me to solidify in my personal life experience, that conscious monogamy is in fact exactly what I choose and desire.

I am single, and I believe in Soul Mates. I believe each of us has an individual reason for being alive. Our desires are meant for us in this lifetime. Sometimes my seemingly more traditional beliefs are not very popular, especially amongst the "spiritually evolved" lifestyle set and so in the past this debate has lead me to doubt my own knowing.

For me, I am unable to achieve intimacy without an emotional bond with my partner, and a commitment of loyalty and fidelity.

That's not to say I haven't had one or two one night stands or attempted casual sexually intimate relationships along the way...

But I have learned that I can only do what feels right for me, and causal relationships don't— even when other people project their own feelings and insecurities on my desires. The romantic world is difficult to navigate, no matter how you feel or don't feel about sex, so the best thing you can do for yourself is trust yourself.

I understand that it is my chemical and emotional makeup, along with some earlier traumatic imprinting and physical wounding that makes it necessary for me to have a certain level of trust and loyalty to let my guard down and let someone in.

In short, to have an orgasm, I must be emotionally connected and trust the other person.

I've just learned that some people call this demisexual— meaning I am only turned on when there is an emotional connection. I cannot have an orgasm when I don't have a sense of security, trust, and that established emotional connection with the other.

A demisexual is a person who does not experience sexual attraction unless they form a strong emotional connection with someone.

In investigating the definition of demisexual a bit further, it is considered to be on the scale of asexuality, and although I do not identify with this, I would identify as being a very sexual person, with a healthy liabido, I have harbored a lot of shame around my desires to have a "traditional" monogamous committed relationship, gasp, even long term partnership... I have feared that this makes me less enlightened or stunted in my spiritual consciousness— because I get attached in relationship to my partner and for me there becomes only, One. 

What do polyamorous people understand that I do not?

When talking about relationships, and people start to go down the "monogamy is not natural" line of belief, I get a sensation of wanting to gather my skirts and RUN. Duck, protect, and cover!

Especially if the person that is explaining to me "how monogamy is a culturally imposed belief system that keeps us from expressing our true nature" is someone that I find attractive and interesting.

If monogamy is so unnatural— then why is it that I want to experience it so much?!

I long to be fully received and profoundly known by another. This has been a guiding light shining the way on my Spiritual Path.

Once, for a moment, after being told by my lover that he was sleeping with another woman and that he was polyamorous, I contemplated whether I could be poly too.

I had not consented to being in a polyamorous relationship, I had, however, by default, consented to a sexual relationship without a commitment of fidelity. Truthfully, that situation left me feeling betrayed and rejected. And then I became ashamed that I wasn't spiritually advanced enough to understand how sharing my lover with another woman or another man could actually bring me greater satisfaction and intimacy?

It seemed to me, from my point of view, I wasn't getting all I wanted from my lover in the first place, so how could he possibly give more to two or three or four of us?

In those moments, I contemplated whether or not I could be polyamorous. And immediately my answer was, No. I'm just not wired that way.

I can imagine that some people are just not wired for monogamy, either. As much as I am not built for polyamory.

As someone well articulated in a discussion group on poly vs mono said: "Some people who are naturally monogamous, aren’t good at it, and some are. Some people who are naturally polyamorous aren’t good at it, and some are. The same principles that make ANY relationships work well transcend relationship type: honesty, transparency, humility, vulnerability, knowledge of self, and emotional literacy – all these are healthy, natural things."

I have had many lovers, and many lovers outside the realm of a committed relationship, and some have had tremendous impact on my life and the person that I am today. A few lovers have been no less than my Spiritual Soul Mates, in that we powerfully and irrevocably changed the course of each other's lives for the good, and remain Spiritual Catalysts in each other's lives and friends to this day. But we are no longer lovers. I haven't figured out how to be lovers and not committed solely to that person.

As a demisexual person I still feel primary sexual attraction to strangers— but it's fleeting.  And when pursued or I actively pursue one of these fleeting moments of attraction, the attraction seems to disappear almost immediately.

On the flip side, I have found myself very confused by my friendships with men. I tend to "fall into bed" with every man with whom I feel an emotional bond, or when we are actively cultivating an emotionally intelligent reciprocal relationship— even if based in friendship. Most, if not all, of my unrequited love affairs have been born from this emotional connection, coupled with the physiological attachment that happens when a person makes love with another human being.

Oxytocin is a chemical released in both men and women after we have sex, it is called the “attachment molecule". In the context of casual sex, oxytocin can create a sense of attachment to someone we don't really know that well.

I would be so bold as to say that most of us cannot have casual sex.

This is an incredibly unpopular viewpoint, when I speak it, both to men and to women. Nevertheless, I encounter this energetic and physiological reality time and time again in my own personal relationships and also of those of the people I work with on an individual basis.

I would argue that when two people come together, especially in an intimate exchange, there is an energetic cord or energetic bond that is created between the two people that remains even after we are physically separated by space and time.

A few of the men I've had this conversation with, will like to argue with me, that they've had multiple partners who wanted nothing but casual encounters, and that's how most of their girlfriends started out this way— casual.

"Ah ha! That just proves my point", I say— "Women bond when we have sex, the more sex we have with a person the stronger the bond, even if we don't understand why we feel this way!"

I don't know all women, but if your ex-girlfriend were my friend and we were having the same conversation I would caution her that she may be fooling herself into believing that she is capable of having a casual sexual relationship without any emotional attachment. Due to our chemical make up, our physical receiving of another, and most likely because of our past traumas we may have created emotional blocks that we believe prevent us from emotional bonding, but in reality, our physiological and spiritual makeup does not protect us from attachment when we have sex.

No matter how guarded or unattached you may believe yourself to be, we must consider the physiological, energetic, and emotional bonding that is happening while having sex— with anyone.

To say women cannot partake in casual sex, if they so choose to do so, would be disempowering. My hope in sharing my experiences so openly with you is the opposite. I hope that sharing my emotions, doubts, desires, and sexual feelings helps to empower you to get clear on how you feel and what it is that you desire male, female, heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, asexual, transgender, queer, poly or mono.

We can't empower ourselves without understanding ourselves first. And we can't understand ourselves if we aren't being honest with ourselves, first.

Avoiding, repressing or denying the fact that we are, biologically, emotional feeling creatures does not help. The only way to integrate and feel free to express ourselves and our emotions is by becoming aware of them and uncovering what these desires and emotions are trying to tell us about ourselves.

We think of monogamy as natural, but it’s actually quite advanced—the trouble is we default to it out of fear instead of choosing it consciously.
— A Polyamorist View of Monogamy

(A snippet from: A Polyamorist View of Monogamy by Michael McDonald)

Monogamy is normal, but not natural. It is the cultural norm, with centuries of assumptions and confirmation bias backing it up, and it may seem like sacrilege to say that it is unnatural, but then again it was once sacrilege to say that the earth revolved around the sun instead of the other way around.

This doesn’t mean that humans cannot be or should not be monogamous, because:

Humans are not limited by their nature.

We, with our potential access to greater consciousness, self-reflection and will, are able to adapt, abstract, resist, and reprogram our nature. As humans, it is our nature to embrace our nature, and also to rise above it. Not to leave it behind, but to both transcend and include it.

Arguably, polyamory requires a lot more “work” than monogamy. It’s logistically more challenging managing multiple relationships—there are only so many hours in a week. With more people, there are more emotions, more stories and needs and personalities to address, so there is more learning and personal development required.

But if monogamy is so much simpler than polyamory, why does it feel like so much work? Shouldn’t one relationship be easier than two or more? In my experience, monogamy is hard in a way that polyamory is easy.

Monogamy is more advanced than polyamory.

Now, before the polyamory camp gets offended and the monogamy camp gets righteous, I’m about to reverse the offense:

Monogamy is more advanced than polyamory, because monogamy is less natural than polyamory.

Nature, as I’m using the word here, is what happens of its own accord. Our human nature is what happens when we are connected with our inherent well-being, free of habitual patterns, emotional wounds, limiting beliefs, societal conditioning, and oppression. Obviously none of us are living 100 percent within our nature, but the more we see it, the easier it is to gravitate back toward it.

Secure attachment is natural. Anxious and avoidant attachment is unnatural.

How most people practice monogamy is a form of anxious attachment, using monogamy to “fix” their fears, to “get” love and support from the outside because they don’t think they are whole on the inside. Unconscious monogamy is based on expectations instead of agreements. It lacks the distinctions and positivity and naturalness of polyamory. It is focused on security instead of possibility.


That’s not to say we’ll all end up polyamorous one day. Monogamy, when chosen consciously, is an extraordinary expression of love and completeness—it’s just that it’s often not chosen consciously.

Conscious monogamy is where both the natural and the unnatural aspects of monogamy are embraced. Conscious monogamy is a consciously chosen and co-created relationship structure, a container, to encourage more personal and relational growth.

Conscious monogamy is a long-term transformational workshop.

In my own exploration of self healing past sexual traumas and unwinding the attachment issues of imprinting and family, I know that in my relationships I require a container of trust and loyalty and mutual commitment, exploring poly/open sexual relationships can cause my earlier wounds to be restimulated.

This is my truth, and to deny it or repress it, or to make it wrong, or try to change it for another would be doing myself a disservice as well as any potential partner. In other words, I would be lying to myself and my potential partner. I think we can all agree that starting off a relationship in a lie is a bad place to start.

If my truth is a deal breaker with a potential partner, its best to know it upfront rather than get entangled in the energetic and emotional cords that happen when the "attachment molecule" becomes involved.

My primary loving relationship is to myself and my relationship to my Creator. I would want nothing less for my partner and my lover to have his own primary loving relationship with himself and his Creator. From that place of pure love, I believe it is possible to experience an even greater depth of intimacy with each other.

But I had to get clear on that. I had to get clear on me. I had to do the Inner Work, first!

Loving oneself equals knowing oneself... knowing oneself equals loving oneself... and from that place of wholeness and love, we can experience, give and receive love from another... and that is my Spiritual Truth...

If you find yourself repeating self defeating patterns time and time again... it is time to do the INNER WORK!!! Educate yourself on secure, anxious, and avoidant attachment styles... this is important.

It seems to me.... there is a spectrum, a full rainbow of light and depth of the human experience. We each have our unique desires within us that serve a purpose, and our "life purpose" is to BE this, live this desire, and express our unique light, color, and calling.

But first we must be honest with ourselves. We must get clear on how we feel and what we want, and then not be afraid to want what we want and ask to be fully and completely received and fulfilled by the Universe.

  • Some people are, naturally monogamous

  • Some people are, not naturally monogamous

  • Some people are, inclined toward some form of open relationship

  • Some people are, naturally hardwired polyamorous

  • Some people are not inclined one way or the other, and could quite happily be either poly or mono depending on a partner, and for them it’s not hardwired, it is actually a lifestyle choice.

  • Be honest with yourself, be honest with those you are in relationship with

The heart wants what the heart wants.

Don't deny what the heart wants, and don't make yourself wrong for what it is that you want.

The desires and longings within you are signposts on the map to guide you to inner fulfillment.

The Soul knows the way.

You are not the culmination of your past deeds, actions, or relationships.

Everyone has free will.

You are powerful, emotions shapes worlds, thoughts become things.

And if you no longer want to be in your marriage— time to speak it.

And if you are in love with your best friend —  time to show her.

And if you are afraid to love —  time to ask for help.

And if you are afraid of who you are — time to get to know you.

And if you no longer enjoy the work you are doing in the world — time to change it.

And if you don't know what your purpose is on this earth — time to seek it.

And if you are ready to know your worth — time to claim it.

And if you long for freedom — time to own it.

And if you want to be whole —  time to be it.

With so much love in my heart,

 
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My writing is a reflection of my inner world and my opinions... I expect you have a multicolored rainbow inside of you too, wanting to be expressed. I reserve the right to change my mind, as I explore and evolve and would expect and respect nothing less from anyone else... :)

May love and blessings abound on your truthful path. With love, Chloë


There are many energy medicine and healing techniques that can help you get clear and powerful in your own energy, and that can be used to help free yourself from limiting patterns, and overcome attachments that keep you stuck or in fear.

Energy Medicine Practitioner

Although you can learn the basics of energy medicine on your own, if you, or someone you know if feeling stuck and hopeless to make changes, or is battling with anxiety, and you are interested in learning more about energy medicine you can book an appointment with Chloë → here.

Chloë is a professionally trained Energy Medicine Practitioner, Master Life Coach & an Initiate of the Pampamesayok Lineage of Andean Energy Medicine, and certified Shamanic Practitioner of Native American Healing Arts. As well as trained in multiple energy healing modalities, such as EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) and bioenergy healing, NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programing), and several other alternative medicine techniques for self healing and personal growth. She has also received Yoga Instructor & Meditation Instructor certifications. Chloë offers one-on-one coaching programs, as well as leads spiritual journeys to places like Machu Picchu throughout the year, please join the newsletter to receive free tips and tools for your personal growth, and announcements and on classes and spiritual retreats throughout the year.


Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

What Happens When You Give Up?

Be who you want, Healing, Learning to Love YourselfChloë RainComment
Who do I become if I deny where I came from?

We have all met those kinds of people, the empty shell people. They seem normal enough, but there is something missing. You wonder what happened to them?

You wonder what made them stop trying? Or maybe they gave up on something important or gave up on a dream? You wonder when they lost that thing, that spark, that drive, but you know somewhere along the line they gave up.

Maybe, they started telling themselves that story about how life doesn’t work out for them. And once they started telling themselves that story, they’ve never been the same ever since.

After a few disappointments and regrets, it's natural to start telling ourselves that story. After a lot of disappointments and failures it’s natural to give up on that thing you've been trying to make happen in your life. You begin to fear that you don’t have what it takes and you tell yourself that this is as good as it’s ever going to get.

May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.
— Nelson Mandela

Maybe you give up on yourself in some small way and you tell yourself its no big deal. Or you decide to give up on finding real love, you tell yourself relationships are hard and people suck.

You give up on ever feeling fulfilled or figuring out what it is you really want to do with your life, because so far everything you’ve tried ends up falling short. It seems that thing you've been wanting for so long will always be just outside your grasp, and it begins to feel like mission impossible to have, achieve, receive, or be content. 

Most of us never bridge the gap between the life we aspire to lead and the life we are currently living.

We get caught up in that story we keep telling ourselves. Most of us get stuck in the gap because there is a huge gravitational pull to the familiar and we don’t realize that giving up, isn't just a one time choice, it's a choice we continue to make over and over again every time we tell ourselves that story.

I’d spent most of my adult life seeking my fortune, trying make something of myself, and get as far away as possible from my humble beginnings and the small town I had grown up in. And I guess I’d managed to do that considering I was living in about 2,780 miles away from the place I was born and my seemingly perfect urban life was a far cry from my rural roots.

Then one day there is a wake up call and I look around and everything seems to be a little less like what I thought, there is a luster to life that’s missing. And I wondered what happened?

Then returning to that place I had left behind, after seeking myself for so many years, I come to find out that the thing I was seeking was there all along, buried deep inside, in that place I had locked away after all those disappointments and regrets.

As adults, we learn to protect ourselves, emotionally, by giving up. We keep ourselves safe by denying that impulse within that is urging us to keep going and keep hoping long after we should have given up.

But life has a funny way of bringing us back to our roots and reminding us of where we came from and who we dreamed we’d be some day. Life always seems to come full circle, its as much as cliché as it is an evident truth.

The stories that unfold in our lives have such intricate and subtle beauty if we allow ourselves to open to the experience of living instead of judging ourselves based on where we think we should be or who we think we should be in our lives.

The more I have surrendered to the ebb and flow of my life, and let go of the need to know why things happen the way that they do…. the more meaning and purpose has been revealed to me in the unfolding of things.

Perhaps this is the greatest human experience, to learn to trust that by following your heart and remaining open, you will receive everything you need, and become everything you were always meant to be.

The experience of fulfillment, of finding yourself, and experiencing your dreams coming true, isn't about getting what you want, it is in learning to love who you are, and what you’ve got and where you are, right here, right now without having to go, do, or be anything else. 

Sometimes your idea of who you should be gets in the way of who you really are.
— Chloë Rain

So often, people feel like "there's got to be more to life..."

Maybe it feels like you’re missing out on your potential in life, career, or maybe you haven’t found the right partner in love… 

You need to know that your life purpose exists and who you are serves a greater purpose in this world. 

How do I know about this? 

...from my unique challenges in life, starting from when I almost died in an accident, then later was diagnosed with a debilitating autoimmune disease, and risked everything I had ever created in order to recover my health and ultimately my happiness. 

I learned teachable techniques that helped me to grow a meaningful business which serves people around the world, and live a life filled with love, purpose, adventure, and miracles.  

The same techniques I've used to create a life worth living, I have taught to many people who have then become successful in life, love, and career; and I'd like to teach you how to start finding and restoring your life purpose too. I can promise that you will never look at life the same way again.

Whether you are considering making a life transition and don't know where to begin, or stuck in the same self-defeating patterns year after year, life coaching offers unparalleled results in creating lasting transformation.

Why not set up a free 30 minute consultation to see how this potent form of healing could make a difference in your life? Schedule a Free Consultation Today or Learn More Here.

Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

Have Your New Year's Resolutions Already Failed? Here's a Better Idea...

Inspiring, Learning to Love Yourself, Life LessonsGuest Writer
Why New Year's Resolutions Fail

Statistically speaking, 80% of New Year's Resolutions fail by February.

I didn't make New Year's Resolutions this year, because I know they tend to be more of a reason to beat myself up later for failing, than helpful intentions to guide the year ahead of me.

"Every year, millions of Americans make New Year’s resolutions, but research suggests only a fraction actually keep them.

Things like weight loss and getting more exercise are typically among the most popular resolutions, but this year a new Marist poll found that “being a better person” tops the list."  

— ASHLEY WELCH CBS NEWS December 30, 2016


What was it you were wanting to change this year?

  • Is it finally time to lose those ten pounds?
  • Is it finally time to leave that job that devalues you?
  • Is it finally time to get your finances in order?
  • Is it finally time to meditate daily or ramp up your spiritual practice?
  • Is it finally time to exercise more?

This list above comes from my own resolutions made over and over again. I use the word ‘finally’ because New Year’s resolutions are sort of like those promises you make to yourself when you go to bed each night.

  • “Tomorrow” I’ll get up early and meditate.
  • “Tomorrow” I’ll eat a healthy breakfast.
  • “Tomorrow” I’ll go in and ask for a raise.
  • “Tomorrow” I’ll change my spending habits.
  • “Tomorrow” I’ll exercise first thing.

A few years ago I had the stunning revelation that “tomorrow” is ALWAYS tomorrow.

Now that may not seem stunning to you but it stopped me cold. I got it. Finally I got it!

I heard the voice of Yoda in my head saying ‘There is no TRY, only DO or not DO.”

So I stopped making New Year’s resolutions and instead started thinking about my life along certain themes. I became so enamored of this idea that I did away with resolutions entirely and focused instead on a theme that would carry me through each New Year.

CREATING THEMES INSTEAD OF RESOLUTIONS: "SIMPLIFY MY LIFE"

My first theme was ‘simplifying my life’ and in the years I worked with that theme I moved twice, each time letting go of a lot of material goods I no longer needed or wanted.

But getting rid of furniture, clothing and knick-knacks was not the real benefit of working on my theme. I also made some important changes in my work relationships and activities. So I found myself letting go of relationships that weren’t fulfilling (not easy!) and refocused my work around a few key areas instead of trying to do everything that floated into my busy brain.

MY NEXT THEME WAS: "FINISHING WHAT I START"

As a writer filled with the impulse to create I struggle with staying with one project at a time long enough to get something finished. So that theme was all about completion for me and I carried that theme with me in all areas of my life finally getting books into publishing, getting my website in the hands of developers for a redo and also completing some aspects of my legal business structure that I had put off for a while.

I also discovered that my themes tend to span years and bring lots of opportunities for growth and the empowerment of choice.  And the old themes stay with me even as I choose a new theme for the New Year. So I continue to simplify as I go and also keep the lessons in completing what I am working on before moving on to the next great idea.

MY NEXT THEME WAS: "I AM ENOUGH."

That theme proved to be a real challenge and brought me lots of opportunities for growth as I stepped into my life in all areas as ‘enough.’ Over time I found I became more confident and more at peace with all aspects of my life and definitely no longer someone willing to allow other people’s expectations to define me but it is still very much a theme in progress.

That theme led directly to my next theme which was ‘self-love – body, mind, spirit.’

With that theme in my head and heart, I released 40 excess pounds and got healthier on many levels. I focused on self-forgiveness and released a lot of unresolved emotion around past events.

AND THAT THEME HAS LED TO MY THEME FOR 2017:  "RELEASING THE PAST."

This year I will work to align my thoughts, emotions and actions with presence.  For me, and maybe for you, it is so easy to get stuck in the mind ruminating over mistakes, poor choices and missed opportunities. Even though I know the past is over and done, it creeps into my present and affects my actions and choices.

But not any more.

MY NEW MANTRA IS: "ONLY TODAY EXISTS."

I like to create mantras and affirmations around my theme for the year and this one snaps me into presence like no other. Just like all my other themes, my new focus will bring many challenges as I release long-standing patterns of procrastination, prioritizing others’ needs before my own or holding back from fears that originated in past events. I know my theme will continue to change my life in ways large and small.

HOW TO WORK WITH THEMES FOR 2017

I invite you to join me in working with Themes rather than resolutions this year and begin your process of first envisioning the life you want and then choosing a theme that will support your most cherished dreams.

To help you I have created an e-workbook called Themes and Dreams that explains the process and includes worksheets for you to use to create your own theme(s) for 2017.

Just click here to get my free e-book – it is my Gift for you!

Wishing your 2017 to be filled with love, light and peace.

Reposted with permission by Cathleen O'Connor on Numerologist.com


ABOUT CATHLEEN O'CONNOR

Cathleen O’Connor PhD is a metaphysical teacher, best-selling author, speaker and intuitive coach who loves helping people harness the power of the mind and heart to co-create miracles in all areas of life. She has been quoted in the Huffington Post as a dream interpretation expert and featured as a work-life balance expert in various publications. Connect with Cathleen at cathleenoconnor.com

Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

How To Stay Healthy Even If You Eat Junk, Smoke Ciggies, Skip Exercise & Booze It Up

Be who you want, Guest Writer, Healing, Health Mind Happy Soul, Life Lessons, Learning to Love YourselfLissa Rankin
How To Stay Healthy Even If You Eat Junk, Smoke Ciggies, Skip Exercise & Booze It Up

Ever since doctors started teaching people the importance of smoking cessation, moderation in alcohol intake, a nutritious, mostly plant-based diet, daily exercise, and weight control, millions of people have been beating themselves up for unhealthy lifestyle habits.  Yet the guilt and shame so many feel hasn’t led to significant improvements in the health of the general public. Even though people know how to live a “healthy” lifestyle, most choose not to. Instead, rates of diabetes, obesity, high blood pressure, heart disease, and other largely preventable diseases are on the rise.

Bummer.

While lots of people rattle off about the importance of healthy lifestyle modifications – and as a green-juicing, exercising, non-smoking, health food junkie, I agree with them – what shocks me is how few are talking about the other critical factors that contribute to health and longevity – the factors that are arguably even more important than diet, cigarette use, alcohol intake, weight, and exercise.

Some Diseases Are Preventable

Before I share with you these factors that may shock you, let me start with a hat tip to conventional medical wisdom. Yes, some diseases are largely preventable. If you’re a 3 pack-a-day smoker who winds up with lung cancer, you’re probably feeling pretty crappy about your cancer because you know that if you had never smoked, you probably wouldn’t have been saddled with that disease. If you’ve been eating at McDonalds every day, it won’t surprise you if a heart attack knocks you flat and you have to get bypass surgery. If you’ve been boozing it up for three decades and you wind up with cirrhosis of the liver, well… not to be harsh, but you knew that might happen, right? If you’re four hundred pounds and you get diabetes, um… need I say more?

Yes, if we aim to lead optimally healthy lives, diet, exercise, weight control, alcohol intake, and cigarette use matter.

Some Unhealthy People Live To Be 100

But let’s face it. Some smoking, boozing, overweight, junk food binging couch potatoes stay healthy and die of old age. As a physician, these people have always blown me away. How are their bodies so resilient to such poisons? Is it genetic? Is it just dumb luck? These people left me scratching my head, until I was doing the research for my book Mind Over Medicine: Scientific Proof You Can Heal Yourself (Hay House, 2013).

Clearly, there are many factors contributing to why one person winds up sick when another stays healthy, in spite of poor health habits. The same is true for the health nut who is doing everything “right” but still winds up sick.

So what are these factors that your doctor probably isn’t discussing with you?

Loving Community Equals Health

Let me start by telling you a story.

Once upon a time, a tribe of Italian immigrants crossed the Atlantic and settled in Roseto, Pennsylvania, where they didn’t exactly live the most “healthy” lifestyle. They ate meatballs fried in lard, smoked like chimneys, boozed it up every night, and pigged out on pasta and pizza. Yet, shockingly, they had half the rate of heart disease and much lower rates of many other illnesses than the national average. It wasn’t the water they drank, the hospital they went to, or their DNA. And clearly, it wasn’t their stellar diet. So what was it that made the people of Roseto so resistant to heart disease?

One physician, baffled by their low rates of heart disease, studied the townspeople to determine why they were so protected.

The Effects of Loneliness On The Body

What his researchers found is that the tight knit community living in multi-generational homes and enjoying communal dinners and frequent festivities provided solace from the loneliness so many people feel. The love and support of others in the close knit community alleviated the stress and overwhelm many lonely people feel. Researchers posit that the stress lonely people feel, which increases cortisol levels and activates the sympathetic nervous system, raising heart rate, elevating blood pressure, incapacitating the immune system, and increasing the risk of heart disease, is responsible for much of the illness lonely people experience.

Because the people of Roseto never felt alone, they rarely died of heart disease – most died of “old age”- even though they smoked, ate poorly, and drank.  As it turns out, alleviation of loneliness is preventative medicine, and the scientific data suggests that loneliness is a stronger risk factor for illness than smoking or failure to exercise.

Why One Person Gets Sick & Another Stays Healthy

It’s not just loneliness that contributes to whether you get sick or stay healthy. As I discussed in my TEDx talk, it’s not just your relationships that affect your health – it’s work stress, financial stress, mental health issues like depression and anxiety, whether you’re optimistic or pessimistic, and whether or not you’re actively engaging in potentially stress reducing activities like creative expression, sex, and spiritual activities like prayer, attending religious services, or meditation.

For example, let’s take one person who eats poorly, smokes, and never exercises, but who enjoys an incredible marriage, a great family, fabulous friends, a rewarding and financially lucrative job, a sense of life purpose, a healthy spiritual life, a blossoming creative life, and a kickin’ sex life.  Aside from the cloud of smoke infusing the lungs with toxins and the poisons this person’s body is ingesting, this kind of lifestyle has been scientifically proven to result in better health than the lonely individual in an emotionally abusive marriage, with a soul-sucking job, no sex life, an absent spiritual life, and no creative outlets. The scientific data suggests that the “unhealthy” individual with an otherwise healthy, balanced life is more likely to live a long, healthy life than a nonsmoking, abstaining vegan with a personal trainer who is unhealthy and miserable in all other facets of life.

Make sense?


Lissa Rankin How To Stay Healthy Even If You Eat Junk, Smoke Ciggies, Skip Exercise & Booze It Up

LISSA RANKIN | PHYSICIAN & MYSTIC

Lissa Rankin, MD, New York Times bestselling author of Mind Over MedicineThe Fear Cure, and The Anatomy of a Calling is a physician, speaker, founder of the Whole Health Medicine Institute, and mystic. Passionate about what makes people optimally healthy and what predisposes them to illness, she is on a mission to merge science and spirituality in a way that not only facilitates the health of the individual, but also uplifts the health of the collective. 

Bridging between seemingly disparate worlds, Lissa is a connector, collaborator, curator, and amplifier, broadcasting not only her unique visionary ideas, but also those of cutting edge visionaries she discerns and trusts, especially in the field of her latest research into "Sacred Medicine." 

Lissa has starred in two National Public Television specials and also leads workshops, both online and at retreat centers like Esalen and Kripalu. She lives in the San Francisco Bay area with her daughter. She blogs at LissaRankin.com and posts regularly on Facebook.

Reposted with permission from LissaRankin.com

Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

This is what I know, about that.

Healing, Learning to Love Yourself, Life Lessons, Rites of PassageChloë Rain
This is what I know about that Chloe Rain

I was standing with my nose about ten inches from the glass on the picture framed in a tiny corner made by two standing walls, one large and white, the other, only big enough to hang this tiny picture on that I am standing too close to as to be appropriate, but I can't help myself.

Someone at dinner had said to me,  "So, you're an artist.

And I had fumbled around and managed to insecurely say "Yes" to that statement.

Three years in a row I've been selected for this particular Juried Art Show... and still I feel like an imposter, in a world I am not worthy of.

That moment in the gallery though— with my nose as close to that glass as I could be without being asked to leave —  a full body sensation came over me.

I let it wet me and crash to the ground with a shock.

What a wave. What a joy. Feeling the feelings, deeply, with my whole self.

I am happy.

I know...

Art IS.

Anything that moves me to FEEL something.... music, poetry, painting, photography, video, sculpture, dance, food, sex, whatever.... 

Art IS real.

I feel immense gratefulness for being moved by this tiny piece of blue paint on the wall and simultaneously the live music that is being played by the band a few feet away...

I feel thankful to be alive. 

I can sense there is a place in the world for anything that elicits this type of emotion. There is a beautiful reason for anything that moves one to feel your own humanity.

Even if it's not the greatest shit you've ever seen, if it moves you, it is Art. 

It is worthy. 

If it moves you, it is magnificent.


Five days later, I am getting out of bed with a depression unlike anything I have experienced since my last brutal heartbreak, ten years ago. 

Groggy, from staying up till 4:00 am, I shuffle from my bed to make coffee, questioning my reason for getting out of bed at all.

"There is no place for my work in the world. Will I have to abandon everything, and go back to real-estate development in order to survive?"

Gratefully, a vivid awareness takes hold of me, "You must walk your path with greater integrity now, You do not stray, You pray, and you do not stop praying. But you must stop DOUBTING."

I don't have any idea who voted for who in the recent election. I voted for Hillary, and upon fully conceding that Donald Trump had actually won the election, I sank into darkness.

I didn't expect that this election would bring up very real and very personal woundings for me. Ones that I have managed to silence and bury for over a decade, rather than bring voice to and carry to the light.

I had thought, perhaps, I wouldn’t share the stories of discrimination and sexual harassment as a female professional, ever

I loathe, that I am a statistic.

I have suffered the gender wage gap, I have been the target of discrimination as a woman in the workplace, I have been stalked by my male boss. I have been involved in a sexual harassment case with a prestigious, powerful and married, CEO.

The lawyers said mine was "The most egregious case of sexual harassment they had ever seen." The law firm took up an entire city block in downtown Bethesda.

I haven't wanted to be, yet another woman with a victim story.

I have never considered myself a victim.

When I resigned from my former career, I had discovered that I was being paid literally half of the standard salary of a person with my title and position.  That made it near impossible to replace me when I left.

What it came down to in the end, was business.

To me, it had been personal. It was my life.

I learned the psychology behind that experience, it's called The Confidence Gap. In studies of business-school students, men initiate salary negotiations four times more often as women do, and when women do negotiate, they ask for 30 percent less money than men do.

Why would they pay me more, for work I was already doing? Men don’t accept the responsibility before the title, promotion, and raise are solidified, but women often act to prove themselves first, then expect to be rewarded. Which is rarely the case.

It was a health crisis, I call “all systems fail”, that would take me to my knees and make me question everything, including whether I wanted to go on living.

The decision to resign from my career, felt like life and death. If I didn’t put my health first, and make my life a priority, no one else would. 

When I left corporate America, I thought it was to get healthy, I thought it was temporary. I hoped I was going to fall in love and get married.

What life had in store for me, however, was something much greater than I could ever have imagined.

This week, however, I am grieving. 

I am able and emotionally aware enough to allow myself to feel the feelings of betrayal and heartbreak from deeds done nearly a decade ago.

I grieve with other women who have been sexually harassed, assaulted, or abused by men they respected and trusted, who now have a man as our President, that brags about groping women without their permission or consent.

"I just take." he says.

I mourn with other women and minorities, who have worked hard to earn respect in our professions and communities, that now witness large segments of our nation embrace, applaud, and elect a man who treats women and marginalized people as inferior and spouts fear and hate as rhetoric. 

A man who has made the statement "Grab her by the pussy" a household meme.

I'm not a woman who's easily offended, but even I find that statement disgusting and outrageous. And I've gone to bed with some reprehensible men.

For many years, I have blamed myself, I participated fully and completely in the system.

I believed in the system. I upheld the system.

Until the realization that the system, I so vehemently endorsed, was heavily weighted against me, and quite likely was going to kill me as I worked myself into a health crisis.

Then one day, I found myself on top of a mountain, contemplating jumping from the cliff, a real cliff, not the glass cliff.

In those moments of contemplation, I realized that I did not want to be dead, and if I did not want to be dead, then that must mean I want to be alive.

If I want to be alive then there must be another way to live.

I’ve been walking myself off that cliff ever since. When things get tough in my life, I go back to that cliff and I remember why I made the difficult choices, the ones that terrified me.

I remember why I chose my health over prestige, why I choose personal freedom over security, why I choose hope instead of fear, why I choose life instead of death.

I had to find myself first, I had to turn inward and discover the truth of my existence, and despite the brokenness, fall in love with myself, before anyone else could.

It is more important, now more than ever, to be who you came here to be and stand for what you believe in, to be a steward of substance in the world.

We can spend the majority of our lives, searching for the answer "out there somewhere", thinking one day we will finally "find it!" and everything will be different. But that's not where the answer lies, the healing and the love, and the peace you are seeking lies within, and at some place and time, you have to become still enough to go there in order to find what it is you are looking for.

I was grateful, I had a healing immersion scheduled with a client the day after the election. I spent half the day sitting on the earth in prayer, and the other half offering a wellness treatment to another human being.

The following day she wrote me, "I feel happy! For the first time in several weeks; I feel a genuine happiness inside."

I heard the voice inside say "I do not stray from my path, I keep walking even when my legs are shaking underneath me."

I have struggled with finding the words to explain and bridge the gap between my ambition in the real estate development world and my experience of the Spiritual and profound. In the days following this recent election, I have felt, my story, my entire story serves a purpose, and there is healing to be shared in telling the whole story, not just the pretty parts.

When the intensity of my internal thirst for meaning and longing for purpose became greater than my fear of the unknown, that is when I came to know presence of the Divine in my life, and in all things.

Now more than ever, I am committed to walk my path with greater integrity. As a light bringer, a truth seer, a woman, a lover, and a leader. 

Humanity is very divided. It is our individual responsibility to help heal the divide by healing ourselves first; by listening to the soft voice within you that is calling you to your own inner awakening so that you may align with your highest good — then by holding space for and guiding others to come into alignment with their true self and purpose for being in the world.

By learning to open our hearts with love and forgiveness, and expand our own consciousness, we contribute to the greater expansion of consciousness as a whole, exponentially.

I am doing whatever I can do to contribute to the world to help us feel connected, hopeful, kind and loving to each other and the complex stories we each carry. This is my life's work. My calling. My art. My offering to the world. 

I know that within each one of us is an important piece of the great mystery, I know that each of us are here to contribute something magnificent to this earth and I know that only you can offer your piece. Only in coming together, in desiring to understand the other, with compassion for the other's pain, will we begin to understand and see the greater good that lies ahead for us, and the world. 

I implore you, if you are suffering, reach out, ask for help, don't isolate, CONNECT, and find the courage to do what you came here to do. What the world needs now is your most magnificent self.


Live your purpose.

The Explore Deeply Movement, is founded on a belief that every person, no matter where they are at in life, how old or young, how successful or unaccomplished, how lost, unhappy or confused, has a unique and purposeful reason for being alive and as you turn inward and fall in love with the truth of who you really are, you become whole, despite the brokenness.
— Chloë Rain
Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

You Don't Have to Be Worthy

Healing, Learning to Love YourselfGuest Writer
You Don't Have to Be Worthy

The True Worth in Feeling Worthless

I was talking to a friend who mentioned that she often felt worthless, a failure, a waste of space. I pointed her to a place where she could finally see that there was infinite worth in feeling worthless, that even worthlessness had a rightful place in her, that as a child of consciousness, as a wave in the ocean of life, it was worth something, and that she was vast enough to contain ALL waves – worthiness, worthlessness, and the rest.

Worthlessness was her Guru

Why should she limit herself to just feeling one thing all the time? Why should she be ‘the worthy one’ and nothing else? Was she really so contained, so small, so bounded, so limited? Was she not, in fact, the wide open space of consciousness itself, the no-thing that holds everything, making space for all of life? Worthlessness was her guru, waking her up from her trance of worth, shattering her limited, one-sided image of herself, enlightening her to the true indefinable vastness that she was.

Finding Intimacy in Unworthiness

The true worth she had always sought was actually hidden there at the very heart of her most intense feelings of worthlessness. They just needed to be faced, met, embraced, that’s all. They were simply lost children, looking for a home in her, having been denied entry time and time again up until now.

Standing in the midst of worthlessness, we discovered that we were truly worthy of it. Our feelings of unworthiness have so much worth, and there we truly meet, in intimacy. How ingenious that worth would hide inside worthlessness – the last place we’d ever think to look. This play of apparent opposites is stunning.

So, I say, F**k being worthy. If you succeed, if you score an A+, if you get the promotion, if you win the race, you won’t be loved more. You have to shake off that illusion.

Loving the Unloveable

Love isn’t something that anyone can give you. It’s not something you have to beg for, earn, or deserve. You don’t have to be worthy. You only have to be alive, and you are worthy. Because you are inseparable from the stars, the mountains, the rustling trees in the meadow. And you follow the breath as it rises and falls. And you make room in yourself for long-neglected feelings of shame, fear, unworthiness, sorrow.

You learn to trust the body, its rhythms, the way it tries to protect itself, its unpredictability, its feelings of unsafety. You breathe into the sore places, make them safe. (Safe to even feel unsafe; that is freedom.) To love the parts that feel unlovable; that is the love you always dreamed about, the love you never have to deserve.

The Divine Mess of Your Life

Face it. Your life is never going to work out.

Hallelujah!

That is, the story of your life is always going to be imperfect. That’s the nature of story – always incomplete, always searching for a conclusion, always bound to time and change. In the movie of your life, things won’t always go according to plan. People won’t always understand you. They will mishear, misquote, and misrepresent you.

They will form their own idea and opinion of you, no matter how clearly you try to represent yourself. Your success can turn to failure. Your wealth can turn to poverty. The ones you love can leave you. Problems that get fixed can lead to new problems. No matter how much you have, you can have more, or lose more. It’s never going to work out in the story of “my life”.

Be yourself

For in this moment, there is no goal, no image of perfection, no comparison, no ‘should’ or ‘should not’, and the thoughts, sensations, feelings, sounds and smells appearing right now are entirely appropriate, wonderfully fitting, beautifully timely, and totally welcome, for this moment in the movie. Without a script, how can this moment be wrong? Without a plan, how can life not go according to plan?

Gratitude for What is Given

Realising that your life is never going to work out, and that it cannot ever work out, and that it isn’t supposed to work out, is the greatest relief, and brings the greatest ease, drawing you deeply into the sacredness of things as they actually are. Your life may be an imperfect mess, but it is an imperfect mess that is perfectly divine – a work of sacred art, even if you forget that sometimes. Humiliation turns to humility in the space of just a heartbeat, and all that’s left is to fall on your knees with gratitude for what is given, and what has not yet been taken away.


A Prayer for the Living

Life,
Break in me whatever needs to be broken.
Fix my hope of ever being fixed.
Use me. Draw every ounce of creativity out of me. Help me live a radically unique life, forever forging a never-before-trodden path in the forest.
Show me how to love more deeply than I ever thought possible.
Whatever I am still turning away from, keep shoving in my face.
Whatever I am still at war with, help me soften towards, relax into, fully embrace.
Where my heart is still closed, show me a way to open it without violence.
Where I am still holding on, help me let go.
Give me challenges and struggles and seemingly insurmountable obstacles, if that will bring an even deeper humility and trust in the intelligence of life.

Break in me whatever needs to be broken.
Help me laugh at my own seriousness.
Allow me to find the humour in the dark places.
Show me a profound sense of rest in the midst of the storm.
Don’t spare me from the truth. Ever.
Let gratitude be my guide.
Let forgiveness be my mantra.
Let this moment be a constant companion.
Let me see your face in every face.
Let me feel your warm presence in my own presence.
Hold me when I stumble.
Breathe me when I cannot breathe.
Let me die living, not live dying.
Amen.

Words by Jeff Foster: Article originally appeared on Uplift.


JEFF FOSTER | LIFE WITHOUT A CENTER

Jeff Foster studied Astrophysics at Cambridge University. In his mid-twenties, after a long period of depression and illness, he became addicted to the idea of ‘spiritual enlightenment’ and embarked on an intensive spiritual quest for the ultimate truth of existence.

The spiritual search came crashing down with the clear recognition of the non-dual nature of everything, and the discovery of the extraordinary in the ordinary. In the clarity of this seeing, life became what it always was: intimate, open, loving and spontaneous, and Jeff was left with a deep understanding of the root illusion behind all human suffering, and a love of the present moment.


Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

What if I'm just crazy?

Be who you want, Learning to Love Yourself, Life LessonsChloë Rain
What if I'm just crazy?
I have the nerve to walk my own way, however hard, in my search for reality, rather than climb upon the rattling wagon of wishful illusions.
— Zora Neale Hurston

Grand plans.... I have them. I have told myself I am crazy for them, I have hid them from some because I thought they'd call me lost. Or worse, crush them under their disbelief. I have written my grand plans down, stacks of journals, thousands of pages wear the inked markings of this soul territory, new decades have turned whilst I was writing, I have uttered my dreams in prayers, cried out and demanded them in prayer, then on my knees, humbled, I have begged and wept praying, praying.

Please God show me the way to pray, let me be led by divine will and to know when to surrender my own.

I have bled them on top of the mountain, I have woken to the dawning of a new day and thought, perhaps,
"I am mistaken."

Or I'm just crazy. Or maybe I'm just dumb.

But I'm not dumb, not about everything at least, and I don't mind being crazy. I have grand ideals, and though I've tried to talk myself out of them for decades, for as long as I have had memories.

I wonder now, if I don't try talking myself out of them and I acknowledge, against all sanity, that my grand plans are real and not just craziness, then doesn't that make everything else I've been doing, everything else I've been thinking- the crazy part?

And the grand plan was the only truth all along, and the crazy making was in the covering it up, the disbelief, and the doubt.

 
Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

Fall Rejuvenation Retreat → Join Us!

Healing, Learning to Love Yourself, Nature, Retreats, WorkshopChloë Rain
Fall Healing Retreat

Fall is the time of year that we set up our internal space and make room for what’s to come in the next year. We create fertile soil for our greater visions to grow but not by doing. By becoming quiet and listening to what is trying to emerge from within us.

Sometimes we need to "get away from our daily life" and experience ourselves from another perspective, in order to feel inspired again, this retreat will help you to reconnect with that deeper longing inside of yourself.

The most important exploration of all is the journey to self-love and the discovery of our true divine being. To be fulfilled in life we must come to know our true essence and what guides us to our unique happiness. It’s this internal happiness and learning to cultivate the truth of who we really are that’s revealed to us when we spend time going within during retreat.

  • Come home rested with a new perspective and with enthusiasm for living
  • Gain clarity, open your heart & stimulate your creativity
  • Free yourself from the mental limitations that prevent the expression of your true self and purpose
  • Make heart-felt connections with new friends
  • Connect deeply with your heart's longing in nature

Join an intimate group of like minded souls and experience a spacious retreat that allows time to rejuvenate in nature, receive support for your dreams, connect with others, and follow the spontaneous callings of your spirit.

You’ll be transformed and you’ll take home tools to continue to maintain and deepen your transformation.

If you have questions you can email me at chloe@exploredeeply.com

Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

Are happy endings really real?

Learning to Love Yourself, Life LessonsChloë Rain
Are happy endings really real?

Sometimes, happy endings look like sharing laughs over a warm bowl of oatmeal with your lover.  

For the moment, things are simple and you've grated fresh nutmeg over the top of the light brown and soft oats.

You and your lover debate whether maple syrup should go in the refrigerator and you admit that you don't put peanut butter in the refrigerator even though it says you should on the label.

You're laughing and looking into each other's eyes as you speak, there's such a comfort in these moments that you want time to slow... to slow almost to a pause.

Because in these moments eating warm oatmeal with fresh nutmeg and laughing with your lover, you feel good in your body, you feel safe, you feel happy, almost content.

For these moments nothing is more real than your shared laughter. And all the heartache you experienced before, all the loss, the complete and utter gutting out of the person you always thought you were. Now, to be sitting empty across from your lover laughing, you realize you'd lose it all over again.

You'd go through every pain of losing yourself, of being broken open, of not knowing who you are anymore, of being cleaned out to the point that the shell of who you were fell away, you disintegrated like ash in a puff of the wind. The You, you once were fell into nothingness like droplets into a vast ocean.  And over a bowl of oatmeal, sweetened with laughter and maple syrup, You are whole again. But more full and light than you ever knew before.

This is what happy endings look like, laughing with your lover over a bowl of oatmeal and wanting time to stand still in the moment of contentment.  

And as the comfort of the moment holds you in warmth like a loved child, you realize this is not a happy ending at all.

Maybe, this is only the beginning.

Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!

If I could have been the strong one. I would have hugged you more.

Life Lessons, Learning to Love YourselfChloë Rain

Today is one of those days when you skip all the happy songs on your iPod and to go to the next song that makes your chest ache and your throat tighten and then brings the hot tears.

I listen to every song that reminds me of what it feels like to get my heart broken. 

Over and over and over until I'm so sick with wallow that I pass out in my window seat.

Leaving today feels like the final goodbye.

Saying the goodbye I'd never said before or didn't have the stomach to.

It took everything I had, but I spoke a few emotional pieces of my mind this morning.

I loved you. I would have loved you. I could have loved you, if you had loved me.


After breaking down into tears, I flashed upon the higher perspective of all "small" things like this. 

It is all for the heart opening.... my heart is breaking open.

Still enjoying my melancholy cry, however, I am processing the full closure of everything.

Including this love, he has played a significant role in my life history and now, and now that too is complete.

My dreams of my future rapidly begin to feel more vibrant, more real. As if, this closure has now made the next steps more vivid and only days ago I had no idea what was next, only a few scattered hopes and inklings that felt more like fantasy than reality.

As the landscape changes underneath my body at 36,000 feet, I close my eyes and let the tears roll down my cheeks into the elbow of my sweatshirt. 

My mascara is streaming down my cheeks that are flushed with too much wine from the night before and desires unmet.

I like getting dirty this way.

Something about the dark black of my mascara on my sleeve makes me feel brutal and beautiful.

I should have hugged you more.

If I have any regrets about time not well spent, they are the moments after my hasty embrace with my friends when I was saying goodbye at the last party, and I knew I wasn't going to see them again for a long long time, or the lover I meant to say something profound to, before I exited our bed, our intimacy, never to see each other that way again, knowing it was forever.

I should have hugged you deeper, longer, stronger. 

I should have been the stronger one and made you stay, awkwardly in my embrace, just to revel in the connection of our closeness.

If I could have been the strong one, I would have pulled you closer and got attached.

I would have smelled you, and embellished you with my own touch. I should have hugged you longer and more deeply.

If I could have been the strong one, I would have cultivated the waters. I would have become a calm harbor of emotion.

A safe place, one that mirrors the smoothness that happens over time as the heart weathers, a place to drop anchor and rest a while, surrounded by the deep warmth of my open shores.

I should have been the strong one.

Chloë Rain is a Spiritual Guide & Visionary. She is the the Founder of Explore Deeply and the Explore Deeply Movement.

Chloë has had the pleasure of working with women and men all over the globe to learn to source their inner power, deepen their relationship to self love, and experience greater fulfillment, so they can enjoy the happiness they have always wanted, and have confidence and JOY in their lives, relationships, and finances.

Many of her clients find that their relationships and careers shift dramatically in new and exciting ways after doing this work, creating freedom and joy in their personal and professional lives. To find out more about working with Chloë go → here.

Please feel free to share content freely from Explore Deeply™. However, please be courteous and link back to the original post, and credit Explore Deeply as well as the writer where applicable. I hope you find many resources here to serve you as you walk your path of purpose. Much love!